“So we own Venezuela now? Can you explain that to me with America First?”
“Trump had to take in another country. He’s eating for two.”
“Are you still on that ‘Trump is pregnant’ thing?”
“Absolutely. Until I see that big beautiful baby head crown from his waddle, I have to assume he is still gestating. What else explains the size of the magnificent presidential belly? Unless it’s twins!!! That would explain why we need Greenland.”
“Whoa, one thing at a time. If he’s supposed to birth a great American baby, how can he also run another non-American country?”
“That’s the brilliance of Trump. He already has the perfect guy to take over Venezuela. He pardoned Juan Orlando Hernández, and he was head of one of them… them ‘down-there’ countries. So he already speaks Spanish. Probably. That’s half the job right there.”
“Hernández was in jail for drug trafficking, one of the bogus justifications he used for toppling Maduro. Isn’t that a bit counter?”
“Who better to fight drug trafficking than someone intimately familiar with it? It’s like with Trump: he was an expert in corruption, bribery, and graft before he was president, which makes him best to tackle the problem now.”
“But he’s made it much much much worse, and enriched himself with such blatant corruption that it would be a joke if it weren’t risking the stability of our economy and our government both now and for all future generations.”
“Yes, but you are forgetting one thing…”
“What’s that?”
“I really don’t care. Do you?”
